


Words of Wisdom

by PL600_Simon



Category: Green Lantern: The Animated Series
Genre: Angst, F/M, I suppose, Implied Death, somewhat of a life story, vague writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 02:17:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10584360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PL600_Simon/pseuds/PL600_Simon
Summary: Emotion is one hell of a burden





	

_ "A man has emotion, do not be afraid to show it my son" _

 

This is what my father told me many years ago. Throughout my life I sometimes felt too emotional, too angry, too happy, too sad, too much.

 

My deep love shown through once I had met her, my soul mate. I loved her with every fiber of my being, wanted the best for her, wanted her to be safe.

 

Sometimes we fought. And it hurt. My sorrow took over and I often begged forgiveness, got on my knees and humbled myself before her being. I wept.

 

I loved her.

 

Sometimes we wept together, a loss of a mother and a strong figure for me. I held her close and told her brighter days would come, that we would move on for it is what her mother would want. We smiled together.

 

I fought for her, I fought for her safety and her life. Her soul was as much as mine as mine was hers. To lose her would be to lose me. The war was long but I came back. I came back to her.

 

She lay still.

 

_ "I came back... I came back for you.." _

 

My heart filled with hatred. Hatred for myself, hatred for the war, hatred for the one who took her away from me. I was engulfed with rage and I lost myself in the red light. I bathed in blood, suffocated myself with it, embraced it.

 

My hatred consumed me.

 

I fought will and any other emotion, my blood boiled for all I needed was hate to avenge her.

 

Will got its hold on me.

 

I was captive for weeks and wished death upon those who imprisoned me.

 

I _hated_ them.

 

They took me to a long-term prison until they could officially turn me over. But I did not care, I deserved such punishment for destroying a world full of life.

 

I deserved to die.

 

During my torture all I thought of was her and how I failed her. How I failed to come back in time. How her death was my fault. I wanted to die so I could be with her.

 

The memories played over and over, never changing. I didn't mind because I could see her one last time, over and over again.

 

But then something changed.

 

In my original memory, I lay her to rest and stood over her body mournfully. I hated myself. But this time... this time her eyes opened and she spoke.

 

I knew it was not her.

 

The will spoke of trying to save me from the prison, and how more will was searching for me. I did not want such help but she forced it.

 

I _despised_ her.

 

The will kept me and I fought alongside them. The hatred I followed was far too corrupt, I needed to fight them. I needed this.

 

She took form once again, soft and gentle just like before. My heart swelled and my emotions fluctuated. I was angry with her, then sad. I was confused.

 

I knew it was not her. I did not want to love her.

 

But love her I did despite how much I denied it. She was not mine to take, she was never mine.

 

She only stole the form of my love.

 

I could not look at her.

 

However my love grew, part of me said she was back but the rest of me knew it was false.

 

I could not love a machine.

 

Months passed, we grew to know each other and I.... found the will to be acceptable company.

 

But over those months the pull got stronger, and I almost lost her again. And in the heat of the moment..

 

I confessed.

 

I confessed for I thought it was my last chance, that it was now or never. But she came back.

 

She came back.

 

I was angry with myself, it was foolish to confess such feelings to a machine. So I pushed her away, and hard. I could not love her.

 

I didn't want to lose her too.

 

My anger brought upon hell to the universe. Rejection had turned her, this was my fault. This was my doing. My own selfishness continued to hurt others. I was furious with myself.

 

We fought. She won. Round and round this went and I couldn't take it. I couldn't let her hurt more innocents. I couldn't let her hurt herself.

 

My heart was heavy.

 

I was afraid.

 

"My father once said, to be a true being is to feel emotion at its fullest. That it shows bravery and strength."

 

The construct formed in my hand.

 

I wept.

 

I had no hatred for her, only love. My construct would never work.

 

I wept.

 

My arms rose in one swift motion.

 

And I _wept_.


End file.
